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I-Chaitra Navratri 2021: Usuku, i-Muhurta, Amasiko Nokubaluleka Kwalo Mkhosi Ungaphuthelwa
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Uma ngabe ubuzithanda izinganekwane ebuntwaneni bakho, uzovuma ukuthi izindaba zothando kulezo zinganekwane zazivezwa njengezinto ezenzeka kakhulu nezijabulisa konke. Kwakuqukethe indaba lapho iNkosana neNkosazana bethandana khona, umzuzu abahlangana ngawo okokuqala. Babhekana nezinkinga nezinselelo ezahlukahlukene baze bahlangane ekugcineni ukuze bahlale bejabule njalo. Yebo, ingabe lokhu kwenzeka empilweni yangempela?
Abantu bangaba nezinganekwane ezahlukahlukene uma kukhulunywa ngobudlelwano, ikakhulukazi ubudlelwano bokuhlala. Bangacabanga ukuthi umuntu onobudlelwano obuhlala nomuntu uthola isigaba esihle kakhulu sempilo yakhe kepha lokhu akulona iqiniso. Kwakunesikhathi lapho ukuya ebudlelwaneni bokuhlala kwakuthathwa njengokungamukeleki emphakathini wamaNdiya. Eminyakeni embalwa eyedlule, ubudlelwano bokuhlala babuthathwa ngokuthi 'abuyona icala lobugebengu' ngohlelo lwezobulungiswa eNdiya. Kepha namanje ayemukelwa kabanzi. Njengoba kwakuyinto engavumelekile futhi isabonwa 'njengento engalungile', kunezinganekwane ezahlukahlukene ezihlobene nayo. Ngakho-ke ake sidlule kwezinye izinganekwane ezivamile ngobudlelwano bokuhlala.
1. 'Ukuphila Ngokungekho Emthethweni'
Ezweni elifana ne-India lapho umshado uthathwa njengesikhungo esingcwele futhi okuwukuphela kwesibopho esingavumela owesilisa nowesifazane (ngaphandle kobudlelwano begazi) ukuthi bahlale ndawonye, ukukhetha ukuhlala ngaphakathi kungumqondo ongaziwa kwabaningi lapha.
Eminyakeni embalwa eyedlule, ubudlelwano bokuhlala babonwa kusuka emqondweni omncane futhi abantu babheka le mibhangqwana njengekhohlakele ngokokuziphatha futhi ingezona izigebengu. Kodwa-ke, kwakungemuva kuka-2010 lapho iNkantolo Ephakeme yaseNdiya nezinye izinkantolo eziningi zase-India, bekhuluma ngayo njenge 'hhayi icala lobugebengu'. Kodwa-ke, abantu basalokhu bengabaza ngobudlelwano bokuhlala, ikakhulukazi emadolobheni amancane namancane.
2. 'Ukuhlala Ndawonye Kusho Ubudlelwano Obubukhoma'
Akukona konke 'ukuhlala ndawonye' okuwubudlelwano bokuhlala. Isibonelo, uma othile ehlala nendoda noma nowesifazane kuphela ukufeza izidingo zocansi nezezezimali noma ngaphandle kwenhloso yokuba nobudlelwano bezothando nobocansi, lokhu ngeke kubizwe ngokuthi ubuhlobo bokuhlala.
Lapho abantu ababili abathandana bodwa futhi beqinisekile ngokuhlala ndawonye futhi bajabulele impilo yabo yothando, lokho kubizwa ngokuthi ubuhlobo bokuhlala. Izithandani zingaba nobudlelwano bezocansi noma zingabi nabo njengoba kuya ngesinqumo sazo sobabili.
3. 'Uma Izithandani Zisebudlelwaneni Obubukhoma, Kufanele Zishade'
Abantu abaningi bacabanga ukuthi uma umbhangqwana usebudlelwaneni bokuhlala, kufanele ushade. Kubo, ubudlelwane bokuhlala bufana nje nesithembiso somshado. Noma kunjalo, lokhu akulona iqiniso. Ubudlelwano bokuhlala buvumela abashadayo ukuthi bazane ngaphambi kokushada.
Uma ngenkathi behlala ebudlelwaneni bokuhlala, lo mbhangqwana ungazizwa uhambelana nomunye nomunye, unethuba lokuqeda ubuhlobo babo. Iningi labashadikazi lingena ebudlelwaneni bokuhlala ukuze babheke ukuhambisana nokuzwana ngaphambi kokuvuma ngokushada.
4. 'Umuntu Akakwazi Ukuba Nezingane'
Le ngenye yezinganekwane ezivame kakhulu ngobudlelwano bokuhlala. Kodwa-ke, iNkantolo Ephakeme yaseNdiya yanikeza isitatimende sokuthi uma owesilisa nowesifazane behlala ebudlelwaneni isikhathi eside, bazobhekwa njengabantu abashadile. Noma ngabe umbhangqwana unezingane, leyo mithetho izosebenza njengoba ibizosebenza uma kwenzeka izingane ezizalwa ngabantu abashadile. Ngakho-ke umbhangqwana ohlala ebudlelwaneni bokuhlala ungaba nezingane.
Kepha uma omunye wabalingani abese ethatha isinqumo sokuphuma ebudlelwaneni, omunye angaba nokuphazamiseka ngokomzwelo.
5. 'Abashadikazi Bangaba Nocansi Noma Kunini Lapho Bafuna'
Abantu bangacabanga ukuthi uma owesilisa nowesifazane behlala ndawonye, ngakho-ke isizathu salokhu ucansi. Noma kunjalo, lokhu akulona iqiniso. Isinqumo sokuya ocansini ngokuphelele sincike kwabashadikazi. Futhi, akukhona ukuthi bazobe bechitha sonke isikhathi sabo kwezothando nakwizenzo zenyama. Bangaba nezinye izinto eziza kuqala.
6. 'Ayikho Into Enjengodlame Lwasekhaya Kuyo'
Njengoba sesizwile iningi lezisulu zodlame lwasekhaya lishadile, ngakho-ke abanye abantu banombono wokuthi abukho ubudlova basekhaya ebudlelwaneni bokuhlala. Noma kunjalo, lokhu akulona iqiniso. Uma umuntu ohlala ebudlelwaneni obuhlala ebudloveni basekhaya evela kumlingani wakhe ahlala naye, khona-ke isisulu singavula icala. Isigaba 2 (f) se-Indian Penal Code sivikela Umthetho Wodlame Lwasekhaya hhayi kubantu abashadile kuphela kepha nakwalabo abangashadile noma 'abasebudlelwaneni bemvelo yomshado'.
Ngakho-ke uma ubhekene nodlame lwasekhaya ebudlelwaneni bakho bokuhlala ungabonisa ukuthi ufaka icala elifanayo.
7. 'Ukuhlala ngaphakathi kukhululekile emithwalweni yemfanelo nasezinkinga'
Njengoba ungekho umshado no-zero ekubandakanyeni okuncane komndeni, abantu bacabanga ukuthi ubudlelwano bokuhlala abuthintwanga ezibophezelweni nasezinkinga umuntu okufanele abhekane nazo lapho eshadile. Noma kunjalo, lokhu akulona iqiniso.
Ngokusho kweNkantolo Ephakeme yaseNdiya, imibhangqwana ehlala kubantu abasha izobhekwa njengemibhangqwana eshadile kanye nemithetho yomshado ingasebenza nakubo. Lokhu kuyisusa ngokusobala inganekwane yokuba nezibopho zero.
Uma ingane izalwa ngaphandle kobudlelwano bokuhlala, kungumsebenzi wabashadikazi ukuthi banikeze ingane imfundo efanelekile futhi edingekayo kanye nezinsiza. Futhi, ingane ingajabulela ilungelo lokuthola ifa lezakhiwo zokhokho nezizithengile zabazali bayo bemvelo.
Ngisho nabesifazane abahlala ebudlelwaneni bokuhlala bangacela ilungelo lesondlo uma ubudlelwano bokuhlala buchithwa abalingani babo.
8. 'Abashadile Abadluli Esikhathini Esinzima Ngemuva Kokuhlukana'
Njengoba sazi ukuthi ubudlelwano bokuhlala abufaki umshado kanye nobudlelwano obuza ngemuva kokushada nothile, ukuqeda umshado kungaba yinto enzima ukuyenza. Kepha akusikho ukuthi imibhangqwana ebudlelwaneni bokuhlala ayihlushwa yimizwa. Uma bobabili abalingani benamathele ngokomzwelo komunye nomunye, bangaba nesikhathi esinzima ngemuva kokuqeda ubuhlobo babo. Bobabili abalingani bangaba nenhliziyo ebuhlungu futhi bangazinzi ngokomzwelo. Ngemuva kwakho konke, imizwa ibaluleke kakhulu ebudlelwaneni.
Ubudlelwano abugcini ngothando nezikhathi zokuthokomala kuphela kepha futhi nokuthi abantu ababili bafunda kanjani ukwamukela amaphutha omunye nomunye, basizane ekufezeni izinhloso ezifanele, bakhiphe okuhle komunye nomunye nokunye okuningi. Into efanayo ngobudlelwano bokuhlala. Ukuthi nje bobabili abalingani baqala ukuhlala ndawonye ngaphansi kophahla olulodwa futhi baphila impilo yabo njenganoma imiphi eminye imibhangqwana ejwayelekile.
