Ingabe ingane yakho iyibhokisi lokuxoxa eliphelele ekhaya kodwa ibambana nezimo zomphakathi? Noma mhlawumbe ubelokhu enamahloni (futhi enamathele unomphela ohlangothini lwakho)? NgokukaBernardo J. Carducci, Ph.D., uprofesa wezengqondo nomqondisi we-Shyness Research Institute e-Indiana University Southeast, ukuba namahloni ebuntwaneni kuvame kakhulu. Izindaba ezinhle ukuthi ziningi izinto abazali abangayenza ukuze bakhuthaze izingane ukuba ziphume egobolondweni labo. Lapha, amathiphu ayisikhombisa okusiza ingane enamahloni ukuthi ithole ukuzethemba.
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Izithombe ze-Koldunov/Getty1. Ungangeneleli
Uma ubona ingane yakho ilwela ukwenza abangani ebaleni lokudlala, kuyalinga ukuthi ungene futhi uyiqhwebe ngokuthambile iqembu elilenga ngokushwiba. Kodwa uDkt. Carducci uxwayisa ngokuthi uma uhileleka, ingane yakho ngeke ifunde ukubekezelela ukukhungatheka (okungukuthi, indlela yokubhekana nesimo esithile ezizithola ikuso)—ikhono elibalulekile eliyolidinga ngale kwegceke lesikole.2. Kodwa hlala eduze (isikhashana)
Ake sithi uhambisa ingane yakho ephathini yosuku lokuzalwa. Yenza umgomo wokuhlala lapho kuze kube yilapho ezizwa ekhululekile ngalesi simo, kweluleka uDkt. Carducci. Umqondo uwukumnika ithuba lokufudumala kumsindo nendawo entsha. Hlala kuze kube yilapho ezizwa ekhululekile neqembu kodwa bese uyahamba. Ungahlali sonke isikhathi-mazise ukuthi uzobuya nokuthi uzophila.
Izithombe ze-Wavebreakmedia/Getty3. Balungiselele izimo ezintsha
Cabanga ngalowo mcimbi wosuku lokuzalwa. Ukuya endlini yomunye umuntu okokuqala kungase kuthuse. Siza ingane yakho ngokukhuluma nayo ngalesi simo kusengaphambili. Zama okuthile okufana nalokhu: Siya ephathini yosuku lokuzalwa luka-Sally ngesonto elizayo. Khumbula ukuthi uke waya emicimbini yokuzalwa ngaphambilini, njengasendlini kaMalume uJohn. Emaphathini okuzalwa, sidlala imidlalo futhi sidla ikhekhe. Sizokwenza uhlobo olufanayo lwento, nje endlini kaSally.4. Hola ngesibonelo
Ungalokothi ucele ingane yakho ukuba yenze noma yini obungeke uzimisele ukuyenza ngokwakho, kusho uDkt. Carducci. Yiba nemfudumalo futhi ube nobungane nabantu ohlangana nabo (izingane zifunda ngokulingisa ukuziphatha), kodwa uma ungazizwa ukhululekile ukuya eqenjini labantu ongabazi, awukwazi ukulindela ukuthi ingane yakho yenze okufanayo (ngisho noma labo abangabazi. abangabangane bakhe abasha).
5. Ungaphusheli izinto ngokushesha
Yethula ingane yakho ezintweni ezintsha ngokusebenzisa indlela yokwenza izinto, indlela lapho ushintsha khona into eyodwa noma ezimbili ngesikhathi. Isibonelo, qala ngokumema lowo makhelwane omusha osacathula (kanye nomama umngane!) endlini yakho ukuze uthole usuku lokudlala endaweni yakho yasekhaya. Uma sebedlala ndawonye ngokunethezeka nangenjabulo, shintsha indawo ngokuletha izingane zombili epaki. Lapho leso simo sesikhululeke kakhudlwana, ungase umeme omunye umngane ukuba ahlanganyele. Hamba kancane ukuze unikeze ingane yakho isikhathi sokujwayela nokuhlanganyela esinyathelweni ngasinye.
Izithombe zeFatCamera/Getty6. Khuluma ngesikhathi owazizwa ukhathazekile
Ngisho nezingane ezingenamahloni amancane zingabonisa 'amahloni esimo,' kuchaza uDkt. Carducci, ikakhulukazi ngezikhathi zoshintsho njengokuhamba noma ukuqala isikole. Yazisa ingane yakho ukuthi wonke umuntu uzizwa ethukile ngezikhathi ezithile. Futhi ikakhulukazi, khuluma ngesikhathi lapho uzwe khona ukukhathazeka komphakathi (njengokukhuluma esidlangalaleni) nokuthi ukusingathe kanjani (unikeze isethulo emsebenzini futhi wazizwa umnandi kakhulu ngemuva kwalokho).7. Ungaphoqi
Uyazi yini? Ingane yakho ingase ingalokothi ibe umuntu ophumayo kakhulu emhlabeni. Futhi lokho KULUNGILE. Vele uqiniseke ukuthi uyakwazi lokho, futhi.
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