Kwabaningi bethu, umshado yinto esasinombono ngayo - ongacacile noma oqinisekile - kusukela kudala, isikhathi eside. Impela umcimbi oyingqopha-mlando, othokozisayo oshintsha impilo. Uma usuyitholile i-SO yakho, uyajabula futhi usulungele ukufika ku-D-Day ngokushesha. Kodwa, thatha isikhashana ngaphambi kokuba ugijimele emshadweni. Impilo yakho izoshintsha isuke ekubeni ‘yikho konke ngami’ ibe ‘yikho konke ngathi’. I-‘mina’ ingase ilahleke kalula kukho konke, futhi leyo yinto ongayifuni. Udinga ukuzinika isikhathi sami esizokusiza ukuthi ube sesimweni esingcono, ngokomzwelo, ngokwengqondo, ngokwezimali nangokomzimba ngokuhamba kwesikhathi. Kuzosiza futhi ubuhlobo bakho bomshado, futhi kungase kube iqhinga lomshado ohlala isikhathi eside, ophumelelayo.
Kudingeka ube nakho okunye okuhlangenwe nakho kwakho ngaphambi kokuba uqhubekele phambili ukuze ube nolwazi olusha nomyeni wakho. Nali uhlu lwezinto okufanele uzenze wedwa ngaphambi kokuba ushade.
eyodwa. Izinto ongazenza - Ziphile wedwa
ezimbili. Izinto okumele uzenze - Zimele ngokwezimali
3. Izinto okumele uzenze - Yilwa kahle
Ezine. Izinto ongazenza - Hamba wedwa
5. Izinto ongazenza - Khetha owakho wokuzilibazisa
6. Izinto ongazenza - Yakha isistimu yakho yokwesekwa
7. Izinto okufanele uzenze - Bhekana nokwesaba kwakho okukhulu
8. Izinto okufanele uzenze - Zazi wena
Izinto ongazenza - Ziphile wedwa
Emindenini yamaNdiya, intombazane isuka ekubeni nabazali bayo ihlale nomyeni wayo izikhathi eziningi. Lesi simo singase siholele ekutheni owesifazane ancike kwabanye - ngokwezimali, ngokomzwelo, noma ngokwengqondo. Wonke umuntu wesifazane, ngaphambi komshado wakhe, kufanele ahlale yedwa - yedwa, noma nabangewona abomndeni ohlala nabo. Ukuhlala wedwa kukufundisa izinto eziningi. Isikhulu esisanda kushada se-PR u-Tanvi Deshpande, uyazisa, Ukuhlala wedwa kuyamsiza ukuthi umuntu akhule kakhulu. Ngingaphakamisa ukuthi wonke umuntu wesifazane (ngisho namadoda) kufanele ahlale yedwa ngesikhathi esithile ekuphileni, noma ngabe yisikhathi esithile. Ukuzithengela igilosa, ukukhokha izikweletu, ukunakekela indlu konke lokhu kwenza kuqondwe umsebenzi onzima owenziwayo ekwakheni impilo. Uba ngozimele ngokwezimali nangokomzwelo; ukuhlela isabelomali senyanga nokukhokha zonke izikweletu zakho kungakunikeza umuzwa wokufeza okuthile. Ukuchitha izimpelaviki ezimbalwa nobusuku baphakathi neviki kukodwa kukunika amandla. Umhlaziyi webhizinisi osezoshada maduze uSneha Gurjar ukuncoma kakhulu, Njengoba sengikwenzile mina ngokwami cishe iminyaka eyi-10, ngingakuncoma nakanjani! Ukuhlala wedwa , ngaphandle kwabazali bakho, kukwenza uzimele futhi kukunikeza ukuchayeka okwengeziwe emhlabeni wangempela. Ukuhlala wedwa kungase kungenzeki ngezinye izikhathi. U-Shivangi Shah, umeluleki we-PR osanda kushaywa, uyazisa, Ukuhlala wedwa kukusiza ukuthi uthole ukuzethemba okwengeziwe ngokuzimela, nokwenza imisebenzi yakho ngaphandle kosizo, njll., kodwa umuntu angakuthola lokho ngokuhlala nomndeni nokuthatha isinyathelo esithe xaxa ekhaya futhi. Umphathi wezokumaketha nezokuxhumana uNeha Bangale ozoshada kulo nyaka uthi, Ukuhlala yedwa kusiza owesifazane ukuthi aqonde ukuthi angayiphatha kanjani impilo (umsebenzi, izifundo, ikhaya) ngaphandle kosizo lwanoma ubani. Imnika isilinganiso esihle sendlela yokuphila esikhathini esizayo. Kuphinde kumcacisele ukuthi ungubani ngempela, nokuthi yini angayenza noma azokwenza noma angeke ayenze. Ngokwesibonelo, ngabona ukuthi angisoze ngawasha izitsha ngisho nalapho ngihlala ngedwa. Ngakho-ke, ngiyazi ukuthi ngidinga ukuba nozakwethu olungile ngokugeza izitsha noma ukuqasha izintombi.
Izinto okumele uzenze - Zimele ngokwezimali
Njengokuhlala nawe, udinga ukubamba kahle ezethu izimali. Lokhu kuzokusiza kakhulu ekukwenzeni uzizwe ukulungele ukushada. UGurjar uphinde aveze, Ukuzimela ngokwezimali kubaluleke kakhulu. Ngibona umshado njengobudlelwane obulinganayo, okusho ukuthi owesilisa nowesifazane badinga ukwazi futhi bazimisele ukuphatha kokubili, umsebenzi kanye nomndeni. Ubani ngempela owenza lokho okungabalulekile. Kungakhathaliseki ukuthi uhlela ukusebenza noma cha ngemva komshado, kufanele uthole ulwazi oluthile lomsebenzi ngaphambi komshado. Ngeke nje kukwenze ucabange izinto ngendlela ehlukile kodwa futhi kukwenze uziholele ngokwakho, kukwenze uzimele ngokwezimali. Ngisho noma ungaholi ngendlela obungathanda ngayo njengamanje, kuzokwenza uzibonele ngokwakho ukuthi ungakwazi ukuzimela futhi unganciki kwabanye ukuze uthole imali. Ngisho noma ushade nendoda eyondla ngokwanele, akukho ukulondeka kwakho, u-Shah uphawula, Ngasizathu simbe, uma kufanele uzondle, uyozondla kanjani? Angicabangi ukuthi owesifazane ngamunye kufanele agxile emsebenzini noma agxile ngokuphelele emsebenzini, kodwa kuhle ukuba nokuvikeleka okuthile nokuqiniseka ukuthi uma kudingeka ungaba wedwa futhi ungabekezeleli noma yini ephikisana nawe- inhlonipho. UDeshpande unomuzwa wokuthi, Uma abesifazane befuna ukulingana ngayo yonke indlela, kufanele bazimele ngokwezimali futhi babe nolwazi ngokukhokha izintela, ukutshalwa kwezimali njll.
Izinto okumele uzenze - Yilwa kahle
Lapho zonke izinto zi-hunky-dory, kuzoba ukuhamba kahle kunoma ibuphi ubuhlobo. Kodwa lapho ama-chips ephansi, futhi kunenkathazo ethile epharadesi, yilapho uthola khona ukuthi umuntu unjani ngempela futhi usabela ezimweni. Amanothi ka-Bangale, Izimpi zibalulekile ukuba nazo. Uthola ukwazi imibono yomunye nomunye, umoya wabo wokulwa (okulungile noma ongcolile). Bakusingatha kahle/kubi kangakanani ukungezwani nokudumazeka. Abekho abantu ababili abangavumelana ngokuphelele kukho konke okuncane. Kuyoba khona ukungaboni ngaso linye, ukungezwani kanye ukwehluka kwemibono , futhi lokho kulungile! Kodwa ukuthi izimo ezinjalo zisingathwa kanjani yiyona mpikiswano lapha. Lapho elwa, umuntu uveza uhlangothi olubi kakhulu lwakhe, u-Shah ukholelwa ukuthi, Uma lolu hlangothi lwakhe luyinto ongabhekana nayo; khona-ke uyazi ukuthi kuzolunga. Ngamunye unokubekezelela ukuziphatha okuhlukene, abanye bangakwazi ukubekezelela intukuthelo, abanye bangakwazi ukubekezelela ubudlova (njengokuphula izinto); ngakho-ke kungcono ukwazi ukuthi yini eyenziwa umlingani wakho lapho ethukuthele nokuthi ungakwazi yini ukuphatha leyo mfanelo kuye.
Futhi esinye isizathu sokulwa ukwakheka ngemuva kwalokho. Kulungile? Futhi uyazi ukuthi nizokwazi ukudlula izinkinga futhi nizixazulule ndawonye. Nakuba ukulwa akuyona into eningi kangako, njengokwazi ukuthi nizokwazi yini ukuxazulula inkinga ndawonye. UGurjar uthi, angikhumbuli ngike ngalwa nesoka lami. Sinakho ukungezwani ngezikhathi ezithile, kodwa besilokhu sikwazi ukuthola isisombululo ngokuthula. Amanothi kaDeshpande, Ngaphezu kokulwa, ngikholelwa nakanjani ukuthi umbhangqwana kufanele ubhekane nezinselele ebudlelwaneni babo. Yilapho kuphela bezokwazi ukuthi omunye umuntu usabela kanjani ngaphansi kwengcindezi futhi ayinqobe inselele.
Izinto ongazenza - Hamba wedwa
Ngemuva komshado uzohamba nomyeni wakho, kodwa uzobe uthatha izinqumo ngokusekelwe kokuthandwa nokungathandi kokubili. Ngaphambi komshado wakho, ungakhetha futhi ukhethe izindawo, ukuthi wenzeni lapho, njll. ngokwakho, futhi wenze yonke into obufuna ukuyenza noma obuphuphile ukuyenza ngaphandle kokuyekethisa. Kulungile ukuba nobugovu ngezinye izikhathi. Okuhlangenwe nakho oyokuthola phakathi nohambo olunjalo kuzohluka nakanjani bese uhamba ngemva komshado. Ungakwazi futhi ukuhamba nabangani bakho, okuzokunikeza uhlobo oluhlukile lwesipiliyoni. U-Gurjar uyanaba, Ukuhamba, noma uwedwa, nabangani noma nozakwenu kunweba ama-horizons akho, kukwenza uvuleke kakhudlwana futhi wazi abantu abaseduze kwakho futhi kudala izinkumbulo impilo yakho yonke! Ukuthi kungaphambi komshado noma ngemva komshado akubalulekile kangako. Kodwa ngokuvamile, ekuqaleni kungcono! UShah uyavuma, Lapho umuntu ehamba yedwa noma nabangane, uthola umhlaba ngokuthanda kwakhe nokukhetha. Bazinika isikhathi sokujabulela nokwenza izinkumbulo zokuphila konke. Iholidi ngaphambi komshado ngokuqinisekile lizokunikeza isikhathi sokuzihlaziya nokuthi ukutotoswa okuncane okukufanele. UBangale ukholelwa ukuthi ukuba neyakho okuhlangenwe nakho kokuhamba ngaphambi kokushada kuzocebisa isipiliyoni sakho seholide lapho uwathatha nomlingani wakho. Ungabeki umkhawulo ekuhambeni kwakho nabangane ukuya ngaphambi komshado, kusho uDeshpande, Ukuhamba nabangani bakho kubalulekile hhayi nje ngaphambi komshado kodwa ngisho nangemva kwalokho. Uthola ukwazi okuningi mayelana nabangane bakho ukuthi uzohamba nini. Futhi, isibopho nolwazi ongabelana ngalo ngesikhathi samaholide kuyinto ozoyazisa phakade.
Izinto ongazenza - Khetha owakho wokuzilibazisa
Uma ungenayo kakade, khetha into yokuzilibazisa ngokwakho. Lokhu kuzokunikeza isikhathi sami esidingeka kakhulu kude nokugaya kwansuku zonke. Kuzokusiza ukuthatha ingqondo yakho kunoma yikuphi ukucindezeleka okuvela emsebenzini noma emndenini. Kuzokusiza futhi emva komshado ukuba ube umlingani ongcono, njengoba kuzokunikeza ithuba lokukwazi ukuveza imizwa yakho futhi ukhulule okunye noma konke ukushuba kwesimo empilweni yakho. Qhubeka nokuphishekela izinto ozilibazisayo nokugcina ubuwena, kusho uGurjar, Umshado akumele usho ukuthi kufanele ulahle yonke into oyithandayo noyenzayo. UDeshpande uyavuma, Nakuba indoda nomfazi kufanele babe khona ukuze bathandane futhi basekelane, kusafanele baqhubeke nezithakazelo zabo ezizimele ukuze banganciki komunye nomunye kukho konke.
Izinto ongazenza - Yakha isistimu yakho yokwesekwa
Njengombhangqwana, ningase nibe nesethi yabangane abafanayo abazokusiza ngezikhathi zesidingo. Kodwa uma kwenzeka udinga umuntu ukuthi abe sekhoneni lakho ngokuphelele ngaphandle kokuzama ukuba umngane nobabili. Abangani bakho bazoba uhlelo lwakho lokusekela ngezikhathi ezinhle nezimbi. Uma usushadile nokho, ungase uthole isikhathi sakho uhileleke ekubeni ne-SO yakho, nabangane abavamile. Kodwa ungakhohlwa abangani bakho. Hlanganani njalo, noma okungenani nikhulume ngocingo. Noma ningahlela uhambo lwesigamu sonyaka noma lwaminyaka yonke ndawonye. Kubaluleke kakhulu ukuba nesethi yakho yabangane, uGurjar uzizwa, Impela, ungase ungababoni abangani bakho kaningi ngemva komshado, kodwa lokho kuyingxenye yokukhula.
UShah uchaza kahle, ngisondelene kakhulu nomyeni wami, futhi singabangane abakhulu ngaphambi kozakwethu. Ngixoxa naye ngazo zonke izimfihlo, kodwa ngisadinga abangani bami, hhayi ukwabelana ngezimfihlo kodwa ngezinye izikhathi udinga ukuguqulwa kwemibono, udinga ukubheka ubuso bakho obudala obuthandayo futhi ukhulume ngezinto ezingenangqondo futhi uhleke amaphaphu akho kanye nobudlelwane ngamunye impilo yakho inendawo yayo kanye nenani, indoda ayikwazi ukuba ukuphela kwesizinda sempilo yakho. Nakuba engubuhlobo obubaluleke kakhulu okudingeka ulondoloze, kodwa njalo ngezikhathi ezithile udinga ukuzinika ikhefu elincane futhi uchithe isikhathi nabangane ababekhona ngisho nangaphambi komyeni wakho. Ubudlelwano obubodwa abukwazi ukubusa obunye. Futhi abangani ngezinye izikhathi bakusiza ukuthi ubone ngale kwempilo yakho evamile. Lelo khefu elincane lisiza ekugcineni umshado wakho uqina futhi unempilo. U-Bangale uyagcizelela, Ukuba nesethi yakho yabangane kubaluleke kakhulu njengokuba nabazali bakho, izingane zakini, amagajethi, izimoto. Kuyingxenye yobunikazi bomuntu wesifazane nokuzimela. Ukuba nobudlelwano obunezithelo obungakhiwanga ngomfana ngokuvamile buqinile bebodwa. Zinendawo nokubaluleka kwazo. Kuyasiza nokuba nabangane bakho ukwenza izinkulumo ezingenangqondo ngomlingani wakho, kusho uDeshpande ngokusineka.
Izinto okufanele uzenze - Bhekana nokwesaba kwakho okukhulu
Ubuzelani. Izikhathi eziningi, siyazibamba futhi sikudlale ngokuphephile, ukuze sigweme ukubukeka siyisiphukuphuku, ukuzizwa sinamahloni, ukuhlukumezeka, kanye/noma ukubhekana nokwaliwa noma ukwehluleka okungenzeka. Ukwesaba kungaba yinoma yini - enkulu noma encane. Ukwenza lokhu kuzokusiza ekwamukeleni ukwesaba kwakho, ukubhekana nakho, nokukuqeda. Kungani ukwenza ngaphambi komshado wakho? Uma ukwazi ukunqoba ukwesaba kwakho okukhulu, khona-ke ukwenza noma yini enye kuzobonakala kulula kakhulu futhi uzokwazi ukubhekana nanoma yiziphi izinselele ohlangabezana nazo, uhlu lwakho lwezinto okufanele uzenze ngaphambi komshado, qhubeka.
Izinto okufanele uzenze - Zazi wena
Umsuka wakho konke, kufanele uziqonde wena - ukuthi yini oyithandayo ngempela futhi ongayithandi, ukuthi ziyini izinkolelo zakho, njll. Ngezinye izikhathi, asivumi ngisho nalokho esikufunayo ekuphileni futhi sithonywe abantu abasizungezile. Ukuziqonda kuzokusiza ukuthi uqonde ukuthi yini oyifunayo empilweni bese uphendula ubudlelwano bakho ne-SO yakho. U-Shah ukholelwa ukuthi, Ngaphambi kokushada, kufanele uzazi futhi zithande ngaphambi kokuthi uthande omunye umuntu. Ngoba, abantu bangakushiya, noma bahambe kodwa umuntu oyohlala nawe kuze kube phakade nguwe. Ukuzithanda ngokwakho kuzomane kukwenze ube umuntu ojabule kakhudlwana bese abantu abaseduze kwakho bavame ukukuthanda kakhulu!
